Runaway train

WARNING – the last paragraph may be suitable only for adult readers.

Isn’t it amazing how far a chance remark can take one when blessed with a circuitous mind? They talk about “train of thought” and all I can say is that mine must be the milk train from Paddington that zooms to Plymouth without any halts then stops at every little whistle-stop afterwards including “Snerthchangefrsnives.”* until it gets to Penzance.

*St.Erth, change for St.Ives – as pronounced by the station master there all my life.
Chatting with my friend Mark Morris I mentioned “the comfy chair” knowing he would pick up on it and come back with “not the comfy chair!” as we are both confirmed and devout Pythonists.
That led me to thinking that in the UK at least, where we are not cursed too much with the Proddy/Left-footer problem, people of my age have their own religions that were formed in youth – you were a Stones or a Beatles acolyte. You are revered if you made the pilgrimage to the Cavern or were present at the Hyde Park concert.
Where conventionally religious people know the responses to the service by heart –
The Lord be with you. – And with your spirit.
We know the ones from our chosen group, music genre, artiste, TV show…
We lived in a council house
Council house? You were LUCKY!
I’ve even taken a Pythonist phrase as my descriptive moniker in the village “Hell’s Granny”. Altogether now…
Pension day’s the worst!


Over 18s from here on cos I talk about sex!

That got me humming the song “Every sperm is sacred” from the Python movie and I had a sudden and total blaze of enlightenment about the interpretation of the Old Testament stricture against “playing with yourself” subsequently taken up by the Christian church.
The line “Let the heathen spill theirs….” and I thought, “oh yes, that story about Onan” and quite literally face palmed myself. That was it!

I’m a pagan FFS – I know the self-dedication rituals that involve sex (so there are dedicated people who don’t have partners – right?) and THAT was what the Old Testament got a bit hot under the collar about. Not the act itself but making it a religious ritual. Jehovah apparently didn’t appreciate offerings of “bodily fluids”. That was all. I’ve hit the answer where doctors of the Church have failed throughout history!

All from a chance remark with a mate – so I think I’ve earned a cup of coffee now!

Oh – and sit back and enjoy the clip

12 thoughts on “Runaway train

  1. Made perfect sense to me. 🙂 I think a lot of religious law is health and safety advice… Don’t be gay, we need you to make sons so we can successfully fight the tribe next door etc.



  2. Often after a hard day, the highlight is going through my emails to find your blog posts.
    Monty Python – always one of my faves! Especially – “No one expects the Spanish Inquisition”!

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